Issue #52

Last Update June 22, 2007

International GOPLand: Hello Burton in Dubai by Gert Innsry March 10, 2007  Our correspondent has been reporting from GOPLand for the past several years, and has established many contacts within that bizarre country. This latest report is based on information smuggled out past security forces determined to classify everything but the Sunday comics. 

Emigration from GOPLand has begun. Like the Mariel boatlift, where along with Cubans seeking freedom and opportunity in the US Fidel Castro exported criminals and mental patients, criminals have begun fleeing GOPLand. Now that America has exported democracy to GOPLand, and the cruel dictatorship has fallen, many apparatchiks and partisans of the ancienne regime have begun to fear that their deeds will be exposed, and that criminal prosecution will follow. With Argentina, Chile and, indeed, much of South America inhospitable to fascists, the question of the day is "where can a safe harbor be found". 

The president and CEO of Hello Burton, one of GOPLand's leading companies (a wholly owned subsidiary of the GOPLand government, or vice versa),  believes that safety lies in Dubai.  He is therefore moving his residence and the company headquarters to that city, one jump ahead of the tumbrils. The pretense that the move is to bring him closer to his markets is fooling no one. Even the normally oblivious and complaisant GOPLand media isn't buying it. 

He may well be able to avoid prosecution at the cost of exile, but Hello Burton will not. It has too many assets in GOPLand and other venues within reach of the courts. It is another sign that the noose is closing around GOPLand's Vizier, as well. Chick Deney, second in command to the putative Dictator for Life, has become a figure of mockery among the citizenry that once feared his every scowl. The tenure of Deney, and indeed all the senior members of the regime, is shaky. The putative Dictator for Life's reign rests only on the reluctance of GOPLand denizens to get rid of him if the result would be Chick Deney's accession to the throne. Once Deney leaves (for reasons of health he might join his erstwhile colleague in the salubrious air of the United Arab Emirates) the way is clear for a clean sweep of the regime. 

It may yet be possible, one day, for me to visit GOPLand again without the usual thirty minutes of warning from the customs and immigration agent. 

See previous GOPLand articles (GOPLand, GOPLand Revisited, and )

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